Tissue heart

I have a heart like a tissue.

I cried almost every night. Alone
Not because I am sad

I cried bcz I feel grateful of what I have
I cried bcz I miss someone
I cried bcz of the unconditional love my parents have for me

I cried bcz of the love I have for special persons in my life.

Love is indeed the priority in my life.
I couldn't think of anything else.

I believe that Love is the most powerful thing in life. And that is subjective. 

And recently I cried bcz of the love he has for me. It is overrated I couldn't believe this is what I am getting. He is like an angel to me. Me. Someone whose heart had broken into pieces.

I still remember how loyal and foolish I was in previous relationship. I followed what he wanted.

1.i have to be home before 10pm. It was hard for an architecture student. I am not gonna elaborate that here.

2.bcz of num 1,I can't even go out dinner with my parents. My family is like that. We go out for food anytime. Even after midnight.

3.bcz of num 1. I can't go out karaoke with my family. And movie

4.i can't go to my boss' son's wedding. But I went anyway bcz it was way too ridiculous

5.he refused to text or reply me if I am outside hanging with frens

6.i unfriended some ppl for him

7.i stopped ym male frens for him

8.i gave him my fb passwords even though he wont give me his passwords

9.i caught him flirting with other women but believed him when he said it was nothing

10.i unfriended all his "sabah friends" so that they dont know about us

11.i cant publish bout us and let "some ppl" know bout us bcz he said that was for our good

12.i have to keep our photos private

13.i can only watch a woman flirting with him but cant do anything bcz I have to keep it a secret. Ouh ya that woman is now his wife.

14.i secretly drove all the way from kuantan to gebeng just to meet him. I drove all the way to klang from shah alam for him as well

15.i took him for who he was. He was jobless at first, no car, he was a bad boy, he did some bad stuffs,I was clean and naive, but I dont judge ppl like that. To me, ppl are beyond that

16.i was ready to fight for us if my parents were to disagree about us

17.i did all I could to be a good partner even though I was hurt

But then he left.

I cried every day and night and it continued for months.

I even have to put my hp away from me just to prevent myself from texting him

I went insane

I started to do some shits.
Shits he did. Which I once wished he would stop. I turned into him.

And that's when Silly came.
He was there from the beginning of that sad ending.

And he turned into.. Old me..
Despite all bad things he saw me doing, which he didn't do,
Even though he didn't like it
He still Loves me.
He never stop me from "enjoying" my freedom
And he never stop loving me

And that continues
Until my love shifted to him
He is too nice
He came to me when i was hurt. He was my shoulder to cry on
He tried to make me happy
He brought me to live comedy,
Theatres, gigs,
He brought me into his life

He helped me out everytime I was in need
He was my saviour

And that continues..

And we are getting more serious.
He reverted..  He came to see my parents..he mingles well with my relatives..  He put so much effort for us.

And I tear up knowing there is a man out there, once a stranger, who's willing to go through shits for me. For me. The sappy, wild, broken hearted girl.